sudden death

Road kill images too gruesome to show
I see them riding my bike along the side of the road
All variety of wild animals and birds
Snuffed out in a moment of sudden death.

This is not a sports metaphor.
If you can’t bear to even hear about it
Don’t read on. You have been warned.
If you are thinking it is fresh meat you disgust me.

They are dead dead, soon decomposing
Stretched into two dimensions, hard to identify.
The snapping turtle caught my eye the other day
Trying to determine what creature got crushed there.

One moment I am riding along enjoying myself
Taking in the sweet smells that trigger memories
Hearing the birds calling, admiring the trees,
Minding the whirr behind me of tire rubber on asphalt.

When looking down I see a fresh carcass
Not the glimpse you see from a speeding car.
I see the blood and disemboweled guts.
I see the maggots then the skeleton picked clean.

Why don’t I look away? I suppose you do.
I see chipmunks and squirrels, deer and possum,
Raccoons and rabbits, a muskrat, bluejays.
Today I saw a young fox kit killed.

I saw it crossing the road as I approached.
I saw the SUV cruising along coming towards us.
I heard the thump and arrived to the spot
As the fox twitched and the blood ran from its mouth.

On the ride back the flies were already feeding
A bike ride like this is a psychic trauma
What we witness happens to us.
So alive one moment, quite dead the next.

I wonder if I may be clipped by some car going by
I remember the thump of the car killing the pedestrian
Years ago crossing 1st Avenue at 4th Street
You don’t forget these things.

I remember Ed Dougherty next to me on the picket line
37 years ago now, crushed under the tractor trailer
Lying in the road lifeless, chest split open
And now I take horrible pictures of road kill that I don’t show you.

wilkinson visit

robin song

That robin this June in the silver maple is so loud
Singing past mid morning now into the afternoon nonstop
Singing at 3 AM the other night like a mockingbird
I don’t remember this in years before.

I think robins sing around dawn and then again at dusk
Talking about the night and day changing
Or after the rain. I wonder is this something new
Or am I just noticing after a lifetime being deaf?

Heard above the traffic noise rising and falling
I listen to the cheeri-up, cheeri-up, cheeri-up tremolo.
Why is this bird sitting there singing and singing?
The ancients would interpret it as a sign.

I love everything alive in the world.
This year I see dinosaur footprints in the bird tracks.
For me this bird is sent to sing praises to all who will hear
Joy to the world for all the creatures in it.

bedside flight

5:30 AM Tuesday driving south on the New Jersey Turnpike
You see the downtown Newark window glass shining bright orange
And I see the red sun emerging behind the Manhattan skyline.
The glow of the sunrise light makes your face extra beautiful to me.

I realize it is 4:30 AM but for daylight savings time
And the sunlight will be with us for another 15 hours.
Your mind is thousands of miles away in Utah
Anxious to get to your stricken father’s bedside.

You are worrying about all the bad things that could happen next.
You are going to be unreachable for much of the day
Hurtling along in the plane chasing the sun west all morning
Hoping he holds on there in intensive care.

I’m doing what I can to take care of you
From cell phone to laptop to sandwiches for the trip.
You are scared and I try to help you be brave.
It’s hard to think straight. I try to help you decide what to do.

It is all so sudden, this life changes in a day.
Saturday all is well, there’s no hint of trouble.
Sunday morning brings vomiting and the gut pain is extreme.
Monday emergency surgery cuts away 4 feet of dead intestine.

Later I hear from you at the hospital.
His condition is grave but it seems he’ll pull through.
That’s such good news. Let the healing begin.
I asked you to tell him what I’m hoping for.

One day you might ask me to have you and yours
While he is still with us and can share our delight
You taking his arm walking as father and daughter
Coming towards me as we join our lives together.